Issues...

My ears hurt from the ear buds I'm wearing. My butt hurts from the hard bench I've been sitting on for four hours. My fingers hurt from typing constantly. It's too hot in here all of a sudden. My computer has completely frozen on me once today, plus only partially freezing a handfull of other times during my time sitting here--thus, I hate my computer currently. My brain is drained...I'm exhausted...and I finished my Iced Chocolate Covered Strawberry Mocha at least three hours ago.

But I finished another chapter today during Emmy's and my writing date for the week. And that makes it all worth it.

Writing Dates

I love having friends near me that are as into writing as I am. One of my good friends, Emmy, and I have decided to start a new "thing" for the two of us. Every week, we're having a writing date. We just had our first one this past Friday. We basically went to Urban Coffee, a local coffee shop, got some coffee (well, I got a chai, but whatever), found a table with an outlet, and settled down to write on our laptops. It was nice, because we both had to write...we could bounce ideas off each other, hold each other accountable. We stayed there for four hours! I got about five pages written, which was VERY exciting.

When I told my mom about Emmy's and my plan, she asked me how that would work. "Isn't writing a personal thing?" she asked me. And, yes, while writing is a personal thing, it's also nice to go somewhere and write with someone. I had a sounding board RIGHT THERE for those four hours. I had someone to complain to if my story started going somewhere I didn't want it to go...Emmy had someone to complain to that she felt her story was getting repetitive. We could give each other advice, try to keep each other from getting distracted. And even better--it was a whole four hours that I had set aside JUST for writing. Because I had someone to write with, I couldn't back out of it or change my mind.

Character Rebellion?

Is it possible for characters to rebel? I was thinking about this when I was writing last (which, granted, was a while ago...getting ready for the graduation party and trying to get scrapbooks done suddenly took over my life) and I'm putting my characters for "Nor the Battle to the Strong" through a whole lot of crap. And it's just going to get worse. The torment I have planned for them, particularly Liz, is kind of ridiculous--but so necessary for the story. Anyway, I got to thinking...since characters eventually take over the story, can't they rebel too? I mean I'm pretty stubborn, so I don't think my characters could win that battle, but I have gotten way past the point when my characters are acting on their own accord. They say things I never thought they'd say...argue about things I never planned them to argue about. I know other writers understand this phenomenon that I'm talking about.

It's funny writing for Liz. Because my story takes place in two different years, fifteen years apart, when Liz is normal in one section, she's angsty in another...and then it switches. She's suddenly gotten really quiet and submissive in the "past" portions of the story...and she's gotten increasingly frustrated, scared, and angry in the "present" portions. It's crazy. I can't control her anymore. I'm going to be really interested to see how she reacts when I throw the worst of the crap at her in another handful of chapters. It's still a while away, but it's building up and in some way I'm really looking forward to writing that part of the novel.

Bookstores

There is nothing more motivational for me than browsing at a bookstore...or a library. There's just something about seeing all those books, written by all those authors, that makes me want even more to be part of it. When I hold a book in my hands and read the back cover synopsis, there's something that makes me think that someday, perhaps someone will be doing the same thing with one of my books. Even if I don't end up buying anything, I still love going and just sitting among all those books that are already part of that club. That's my dream, after all, to be published...to have my book sit on a shelf in a bookstore or a library and have people find it interesting enough to read.

Packing and Graduation

As is tradition, at the end of the school year, I always have to pack up my room (or, in the case of the last two years, my apartment). Not that big of a deal...until I realized that this is the last time I have to do this at ONU. Yesterday I took all the stuff off my walls...which consisted of all the information for "Nor the Battle." All of that information has lived in that exact location for two years. It's kind of sad that it will need to find a new home now--I'm thinking about buying a plastic file for all the info I've accumulated over the past years for this story. I hope my outline feels at home in one of those, rather than on a wall...

I graduate from ONU tomorrow afternoon. Today was the rehearsal (boring) and my parents are coming up for the reception/banquet/worship that's all going on tonight. Scary thought...graduating.

Song of the day...

One of my favorite singers is Stephanie J. Block. She has a new CD coming out (it's on iTunes now, hard copy out June 2) called "This Place I Know." There's a song in particular on the album that has spoken to me deeply, and I've listened to it a million times. This song is called "Gotta Start Small" and there's a section of the song that I really relate to, which might be why I love it so much. Granted, this section is talking about writing a song, but it means the same to me as I've been working on this novel.

I wrote a song today
And I feel strong today
'Cause I belong today
To those who create
An empty page was all I had
I thought it out,
Put pen to pad,
And as I added each line of mine
I felt something great
Using my hands and feeling fulfilled
As for the song,
I'm not that skilled,
Still every builder who learns a craft
Keeps growing by the draft
It's just a draft

And after all
Gotta start small
Facing a bigger, more rigorous challenge,
That's quite a climb,
I'd rather cling to each thing I can conquer
One at a time

Taking a risk is most of the battle
A victory to claim
Taking a risk, no matter how little
Small, but commital
Is risking all the same

Graduation

In 15 days, I'll be a graduate of Ohio Northern University. Today I attended my last AXD initiation and my last Honors Day. And then I got my cap and gown...and suddenly, at that moment, it seemed 100% real. Being the epic dork that I am, as soon as I got home, I tried it on with the dress I bought a few weeks ago (fits great). And then I proceeded to put the tassel on the mortar board and see how the whole thing looked in the bathroom mirror. The only thing I could think was..."holy crap."

It's a scary thing, this graduation--not unlike writing a novel. I'm terrified of what the future holds, mostly because I don't know what it holds. I can't believe my academic career is winding down and in 15 more days, I will no longer be a student. I've been a student since pre-school...that's a whopping 18 years. Suddenly, I'm no longer going to hold that classification. I'll be facing the real world and trying to make my own mark on it. God willing the mark that I leave will have something to do with my writing. Only time will tell.