Thursday, June 17, 2010

TDTL Day Two: Your Crush

FYI...in the case of some of these letters, I may not want to reveal to whom I'm actually writing. In this case, I'll just use first initials.

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Dear J,

I've liked you for several years now, but I'm fairly sure you have absolutely no idea. I don't feel like I've been subtle. I've even stepped out of my comfort zone and asked you to events, but I still don't think you get it. I'm sorry for this and I'm sorry if I've only been obnoxious. I've never been good at expressing those particular feelings, because they make me feel nervous and stupid. And I'm painfully old-fashioned when it comes to relationships, meaning that I have an irrational fear of making the first move.

Here's the truth: You make me smile. You make me laugh. When we talk, I feel like the prettiest girl in the room. I always love seeing you. I adore your hugs. I crave your attention. If I know we'll be at the same place or event, I look forward to talking with you. You give me butterflies.

I'm nearly 23 years old, but I always feel like a giggly teenager when you're around.

Why do you do that to me?

I wish I had the courage to share my feelings with you. I wish you knew the truth. I wish I could be more than that girl you've known for so many years. I wish you could see me more than a sister or a friend or whatever it is you see me as.

I wish you could know how I feel about you.

Until then, or until I can move on, I'll just have to satisfy myself with hugs when we see each other and poke wars on Facebook.

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